Better Jugs

And by jugs I don’t mean breasts, although I am rather found of those particular appednages and have much to….expound upon that subject.

In this case, however, I am speaking of milk jugs. According to this New York Times articles, WalMart, Costco and Sams’ Clubs are beginning to  utlize a new and improved kind of milk jug that is more enviornementally friendly in several ways, will provide fresher milk at the stores, as well as bring down the cost of milk. Sounds great, right. What could anyone possible complain about? American’s always find a way, of course.

The jugs have no real spout, and their unorthodox shape makes consumers feel like novices at the simple task of pouring a glass of milk.

“I hate it,” said Lisa DeHoff, a cafe owner shopping in a Sam’s Club here.

“It spills everywhere,” said Amy Wise, a homemaker.

“It’s very hard for kids to pour,” said Lee Morris, who was shopping for her grandchildren.

Where there is an American Consumer there is a bitch!

Fortunately, the stores utilizing these new cost-saving, ecco-friendly milk jugs don’t seem to give a crap about griping costumers. And in this particular case that is a good thing. People like this annoy me. Right along with people who cannot be bothered to do the  even bare minimum kind of recycling,  like returning bottles and cans to the store. Because it is too much of a hassle. Or too messy. Give me a fucking break.

These whiners’ problem is that the jugs don’t pour the same way as the old ones.

“Just tilt it slowly and pour slowly,” Ms. Tilton [a demonstrator] said to passing customers as she talked about the jugs’ environmental benefits and cost savings. Instead of picking up the jug, as most people tend to do, she kept it on a table and gently tipped it toward a cup.

Of course some people are going to resist this new way of pouring milk because relearning that skill requires too much effort. These lazy, self-centered jerkoffs need to be smacked upside the head. Or publicly humiliated somehow. In the end they may simply be forced to adapt. It is either that or go with our their milk and cookies.


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