I sleep more than I used to.
When I was married I was up — boom — right when the alarm went off. I had to. There were two people that needed to get into the shower. Plus there was our daughter to get ready for school. Our house was quite the busy place on weekday mornings.
I was a light sleeper in those days too, constantly waking in the night to check the locks on the doors or just to wander the house. And there was a stretch there when I was staying up pretty late. As a result I was a zombie all the next day. Don’t get me wrong. I think zombies are cool. I just don’t want to be one.
Now, my alarm goes off at 6am but I stay in bed until 6:30am, and even then it’s a struggle to get up. I feel as if I could sleep the entire day away. That’s probably not true, but it feels true.
At work I often sleep most of my lunch hour away. I used to look forward to lunch so that I could read. Now, I read a little bit and then nod off.
And it’s not as if I stay up late anymore. I go to bed at 10 most nights, maybe I’ll stay up until 11pm, but still….
I realize that some of this is due to age. I’m older now and no longer have the energy of a young man. That’s a fact. But there’s something more to it than that I think. I enjoy the escape of sleep, it’s a much more pleasant state to be in. I suppose that I am depressed to a degree. Just lucky that I have meds to keep me going. yay…
I never used to be one to enjoy sleep so much. I always felt like when I was asleep I might be missing something. What exactly I don’t know. But something…. I just wanted to be awake.
Now most days there’s nothing I’d rather do than just sleep, a sweet dreamless sleep, all day and all night.